Friday, December 31, 2010

The good, the bad, and the ugly

In predictable fashion, life has been incredibly unpredictable the past week or so.

On Christmas morning, I took a shower and while combing my hair afterwards, I discovered that I have a small bald spot near the back of my head, close to where I part my hair. I noticed my hair had been looking rather thin back there about two weeks ago, but didn't think all that much about it, chalking it up to my part line affecting the hair growth. Well, now I've got a full blown bald spot. Luckily, I have plenty of hair to cover it up, so it's not noticeable unless I part my hair right over it. I was freaking out about it on Christmas morning in front of my brother and sister in law and, after a few quick searches, we discovered that there are a million different reasons why a 20something girl would have a bald spot. While I was in mid freak out, my sister in law made a great point: stressing out about it will only make my hair fall out more, so chill out and get it looked at. I know I need to go to the doctor and get the mystery solved, but I've been dragging my feet about it (mostly because I know it will require blood work and I absolutely hate needles). I keep telling myself that I'm going to go today once I finish writing this post, eat breakfast, and take a shower. Right? Right. Go already, damn it.

My mother and I did not get into any arguments on Christmas nor at any other time I was home. We actually had some of the most normal conversations we've had in ages. It was a Christmas miracle! My mother has a thyroid disease and I remember she lost a lot of hair right before she went to the doctor and got diagnosed. Female balding can be contributed to thyroid problems, so I asked her if she ever got any bald spots and she said no. She seemed genuinely concerned about my little bald spot. I got my thyroid checked out a year ago or so and everything came back normal, so I'm hoping that my thyroid isn't the problem. Of course, the fact that my mother and I didn't get into an argument means that she didn't try to apologize to me, like my brother asked her to do. She has until tomorrow to meet his deadline and I'm not holding my breath.

So after the ugly news about balding and the bad news about the lack of apology (that is mixed with the good news about my mother and me getting along), what could my completely good news be? Big surprise, it's about a boy.

Early Wednesday night, I texted a friend of mine to see what she was up to the rest of the week. I really like going out with her, she's like a fun older sister to me, and we always have a great time together. She told me she was out at a bar with a mutual guy friend of ours and that I should join them. I jumped at the chance since I've had a crush on this boy for two years or so. He is absolutely gorgeous, hands down the best looking man I've met in real life: blue eyes, perfect hair, tall, thin. He's incredibly intelligent and is in the same grad program as my friend. We met through another mutual friend of ours (who thought we would hit it off and tried to get us to meet for ages) and we've been running into each other ever since. He was in a relationship (boo), but that ended a few months ago (yay). So, I met up with them and discovered that they had been drinking for awhile thanks to happy hour and were well on their way to Hangover City. A few of his friends showed up too and we were a jolly bunch, all talking and having a great time. He and I caught up a bit, talked about school, work, and he sincerely apologized for not being able to come to a party my roommate and I had a few weeks earlier- he really wanted to come (!), but had a family emergency. Our group decided to move on to another bar where I got to sit right next to him, our legs touching for most of the time.

Unfortunately (or fortunately, I guess), karaoke started up a short while later and none of us were interested, so it cut our night out a bit short. Most of his friends left and there were only four of us remaining: him, my friend, one of his friends that was digging on my friend, and me. He asked me if I wanted to hang out with him that night and I said sure with a huge smile. We decided on his place and got a ride from his friend. We sat on his couch with legs touching, trying to decide what to watch and ribbing on each other for our movie and television preferences. This kid makes me nervous as all hell, so I'm sure I sounded like a bumbling idiot who seemed like she never watched a movie her whole life, let alone could carry on an intelligent conversation about why she liked a certain movie. Bumbling idiot or not, he caught me completely off guard with a well placed hand on my jawline and a passionate kiss after I made a dig at a show he likes. If you're lucky, you get to experience the type of kiss that gives you a sense of simultaneous physical and emotional relief, dare I say weightlessness, once in your life. I got to relive that feeling countless times until he dropped me off at my apartment the next morning, kissing me good bye three lingering times. Waking up next to him, I thought I was dreaming. I don't ever get this lucky. Despite the great night I spent with him and the fact that this long crush has actually developed into something, I am trying to keep my feet on the ground and to not get my hopes up. Like my roommate said, even if this doesn't become anything, I can be perfectly content knowing that I was able to be with him for one night.

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